CHAPTER 6
LIFESTYLE

NATIONAL CHARACTERISTICS
When I was playing polo in England I met a crazy Portuguese player, who was utterly useless at the game and was permanently being shouted at and referred to by the coach, Terry Hambone as ‘That useless f *cking Pork and Cheese.’

(In fact it was rather unfair singling out Luis like this, as far as Terry was concerned everyone except himself was f*cking useless.)

Well Luis and I struck up various conversations, so I revealed to him that I was thinking about moving to Portugal. (This was just after my Brazil trip.)

What he told me was that the Portuguese are brand crazy.

"They won’t buy anything unless it’s a well-know brand and everyone can clearly see the logo on the outside." He joked.

"They are an advertisers dream in one sense and a complete headache in another, because they won’t shift brand loyalty too easily." He emphasised.

And it is true.

The Portuguese are also not very adventurous.

This is borne out by a number of business studies made by British, German and American multi-nationals. They conclude that the Portuguese will never look for original ideas, they will only copy what everyone else is doing and just be satisfied with whatever slice of the pie it brings them.

(This is often a complaint amongst Brits that of the several million restaurants in the country, only a tiny percent don’t serve traditional Portuguese meals.)

So, in terms of marketing if you throw enough money at establishing a brand, watch out for imitators all trying to catch a slice of the pie.

There is also a huge amount of complacency.

For example the most popular and respected bank is the Caixa Geral (General Safe), which has been in business since God was a boy. A very great number of its customers are therefore elderly and urban, which means they don’t have very high expectations of the banking service beyond deposit and withdrawal.

Avoid that bank like the plague.

If you should ever be drawn in there, on any day of the week and especially at lunchtime, expect to see hardly any tellers and huge, very slow moving queues with everyone, including the tellers, smoking. (Before the smoking ban.)

Expect to wait at least forty-five minutes for any kind of service at a Caixa Geral Bank.

And if in the course of conversation with anyone, or during the course of a job you do come up with an unusual idea expect to be looked at peculiarly, or even told you are crazy.

If you think Portugal is right there in the twenty-first century, as exhibited in its smart, modern architecture, flashy BMW's’, Mercs and elegantly and well-dressed populace - think again.

It is all patina - underneath lies a crumbling, cobwebbed, fifteenth-century feudalism.

The gap between the old generation and the new is enormous.

The old are trapped in their Salazar-regime-mindset - one which expected its citizens to shut up and do what they were told. They were afforded the minimum of rights and comforts (unless they were from a privileged family). You still see many elderly folk walking around as though haunted by this terrible ghost of fascism.

(But it could also be that they are ill, cannot afford medication on their paltry state pension and their rat-infested building is crumbling.)

I’m not joking.

You may also meet many of that era who thought Salazar was a god - that he had the populace well under control (as they should be), that what the Portuguese people needed was a good dictator - they needed to be told what to do.

If you meet a Portuguese who tells you this was never the case, it is because he doesn’t want to believe it existed and he’s all-right in his ivory tower.

‘Let them eat cake.’

I have Portuguese/ South African friend named Laura who was actively seeking a wealthy husband, one who could provide for her in her old age, because she saw how badly her Portuguese grandmother had been treated by the state and didn’t want to live through that when she became old.

Let’s also not forget that nearly four million Portuguese are illiterate.

And the blanket that is thrown around the older generation (imposed, not only by the Salazar regime - I’ll come to others in a later chapter) is one of fear - that nothing is possible beyond the introverted world they were allowed to inhabit.

Today’s youth still have an element of that fear, but are much more likely to look to the outside world and its consumerism. They have also taken heart from the influx of Brazilians, who seemed to have drawn their inspiration from close proximity to and trade influence with the United States.

It is almost as if the Brazilians believe anything is possible and will 'have a go.'

Similarly the influx of Russians and Croatians has caused many raised eyebrows...